Couscous

A mightily abused North African ingredient, it is also a very rude word in Arabic, just get the context and intonation wrong and you'll soon find yourself surrounded by people rendered totally helpless through laughter. If this happens, club them before they recover.

It helps to avoid phrases such as 'Mariam's couscous is really tasty'.

Couscous is a small grained semolina, made from durum wheat and used throughout North Africa and the Levant. The packs you buy in supermarkets have been pre-steamed, but the original stuff of North Africa is steamed over a broth. This means that supermarket couscous can be prepared simply by adding boiling water or stock, then fluffing it with a fork after it's soaked for a few minutes.

Buying pre-flavoured couscous, particularly with some daft chef-goon's face on it, is a terrible thing to do. What a waste of money and what a terrible thing to eat: all nature identical ingredients that fill your mouth with the neon plasticity of too-strong, too-bright flavours.

No. Be an adventurer. Make your own couscous. Then add things as you see fit. Try it with a tagine or pop in some grilled vegetables to make a salad. Or make it with a strong stock and just have it nice and plain.